Nienie, Poetry and Beauty

As evidenced by my less frequent posts, there are lots of things competing for my time now that school has started. I think of and pray for NieNie, Christian, the children, and their families every day, frequently several times a day. Since I suddenly find myself so busy, I have decided to write a Grateful post once a week. Grateful posts will appear every WedNieNie'sDay. Why Wednesday? Well, it is the middle of the week and I think we all need a pick me up when Wednesday rolls around and looking at the good in our lives can provide that pick me up. So, WedNieNie'sDay it is!

Poetry class was tonight. We talked about the work of Louise Gluck. Wild Iris is the poem we looked at most closely. After Gluck, we critiqued the poetry of our peers.

My piece:

He sits on his front stoop
still and alone
in the dark
letting the night settle on his skin
Resting his elbows on his knees,
his head in his hands
He collects his thoughts
then empties them from his mind
one by one
As the cars go by
one by one
Soothing him with their steady hum
Their sound the only confirmation of motion
in his otherwise stagnant world
The Man in the Moon shines down on him
and he lifts his eyes from the crack in the pavement
long enough to bathe in the light
allowing himself the danger of dreaming
of something bigger waiting
for him beyond the stoop

Comments include:
eliminate last two lines
Man in the Moon doesn't work for me (many people said this)
break this piece into stanzas
play with punctuation
great sounds at beginning of poem
like the line "letting the night settle on his skin" (many liked this)
"one by one as the cars go by" gives sense of sound, nice
nicely rendered situation
breaks at the beginning gives reader time to settle into poem
love "danger of dreaming", strong line (many said this)
strong ending
strong lines, "lifts his eyes... bathe in the light"
want to know more about "him"

In sharing poetry with others I see that no matter the level of skill, we each have a distinct voice, are developing strong voices. Being in a room full of fellow poets is powerful for me and a privilege because these people are opening themselves up to me through their poetry. I think that poems reveal so much of the interior of the poet and to be trusted with that is such an honor. I feel like my words are sounding shallow, but I am sincere and wish I could express it in another way.

Beauty. This evening I was walking to catch the bus to school when a man, a complete stranger, walking toward me looked at me, said "You are beautiful" and kept walking. I said "Thank you" and kept walking. A bit baffling as I am wearing my glasses, my hair is poofy from the moisture in the air, etc. Also, I don't really think of myself as beautiful; I feel I somewhat blend in until I open my mouth and speak; I think my voice, ideas, and intellect bring me alive and set me apart and make me beautiful more so than my looks. I was also surprised by how easily and casually I accepted the compliment. Where does my confidence come from? How much of a role does confidence play in one's beauty? The man brought a smile to my face and gave me lots to think about. Thank you, Complete Stranger Man!

On that note, Good Night!

Never Far NieNie

This week has been extraordinarily busy. Homework and presentation preparation for school, nannying, and lots to do around the home has tuckered me out and sent me to bed much earlier than normal. Though I have not been very good about posting a nightly Grateful post in the spirit of Nie, she, her beloved Mr. Nielson, their incredible children, and her family have never been far from my thoughts and prayers.

So, I give you,
THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR - TUESDAY AND WEDNESDAY RETROSPECTIVE
the strength and creativity and motivation and intellect to complete work on and deliver a well-received presentation that I can be proud of, courteous people with whom I shared a printer in the computer lab at school, pretty and comfortable cotton skirts, thin but cozy leggings, knee-high boots that put a swagger in my step, moisturizing lip gloss, walks around town, vegan fruit and nut chocolate chip energy bars, honesty from others, health, longish but well-kept hair on boys, sparkling eyes, elevator rides, soft scarves, arrival of new glasses, the quality of the moments my husband and I are able to spend together in spite of how busy we have both been, communication, being busy with such positive and rewarding endeavors, cat recovering seemingly well from Bartonella thanks to a diagnosis by an amazing vet and medicine that the kitty takes as willingly as one could expect, increased self-awareness, unexpected new nannying schedule that actually fits in better with my school and internship schedule, home, taking time out to do fun things that make me happy without taking away from everyone and everything in my life, steamy showers, fall foliage beginning to emerge, opening windows and sunroof and singing at the top of my lungs while driving, boys on bicycles, natural curl of my hair, deep sleep, dreams, aspirations, inspirations, the library, having a library book drop directly across the street from my front door, exciting package from Teen Voices Magazine arriving in the mail, old basset hound named Joe, friendly soccer fans, self control, patience, thinking before speaking, going outside my comfort zone, whole wheat raisin english muffin with organic peanut butter and organic apple slices, time to cook wholesome meals, becoming more aware of the little things in life and what a big difference the little things can make, Christian healing well and being pretty much out of sedation, Nie's amazingly strong body accepting 50% of her skin graft (20% more than average), CJane continuing to give updates and let bloggers into her life and the life of her family, hope, love, soft socks, towels warm from the dryer, rocking chair, memory, appreciation, tomato, garlic, candlelight, night air settling on my skin, hugs and kisses, family, communication, public transportation, swings, being present in the moment, yesterday, today, and tomorrow.

Prayers and positivity to Nie and Christian & family.

IN CASE I DON'T GET A CHANCE TO DO A GRATEFUL POST TONIGHT -
Please think of and pray for Stephanie in an extra-special way tomorrow as she will be undergoing another skin grafting surgery. Thank you!

Presenting and Poetry

Tonight's class began with my presentation on poet Renee Gladman and a piece from her book Juice titled First Sleep. It went quite well and we discussed the poem for quite awhile. I was told I would be a tough act to follow. One person in my class who teaches high school English, asked if I was or ever had been a teacher. I told him no, but once upon a time I thought I wanted to be. He told me I would make a good one which I took as quite the compliment.

The second half of class we critiqued the poems of our peers. Though I have written four poems, I chose the one I thought needed the most work, Observations, which can be found here.
Their constructive criticisms include:

"Not sure about the title's relation to the content."
"2nd stanza doesn't correspond to the description of beautiful boy"
"I would like to know more in terms of concrete detail."
"I like what you have here, but it feels unfinished."
"Are the last 2 lines of the 1st stanza necessary?"
"I'd like more specifics of the boy, define what beautiful looks like."
"Last line may be too large in scope to end with."

Encouragement includes:

"I like the idea underlying this poem, but there are a few lines you might revise."
"Idea presented is interesting."
"Nice opening, nice alliteration in 4th line 1st stanza."
"Nice start."

I am finding the revision difficult because I would like to expand on the boy, but I am not sure how to do it with out revealing who he is or without getting completely away from the original piece. I sort of feel like expanding on the boy is in competing interest with the spirit of the original piece. In spite of my misgivings, of course I will make an effort to take into consideration what has been said about the piece and experiment with the suggestions.

Additional critique from you readers out in Bloggerland would be welcomed.

Party People

On Saturday night my husband and I went to a birthday party for our friend Bijaya thrown by her husband, Tim. It was a blast! They invited over eighty people and so many of them came. Tim and Bijaya have such a cross-section of friends that it baffles and bemuses me. It also makes for an amazing time when you have such a variety of people in such a large number all congregated in one cozy house. I said hello and thank you and good-bye to Tim and Bijaya. I talked to Tim's sister, Liz. I talked to Chris and Mike, two of the sweetest guys in the world who happen to make-up one of the most dynamic couples I know and have a great taste for restaurants that they gladly introduce my husband and I to. I spent a lot of time talking with my best friend, Tanya, about food, her teaching job and the challenges and joys it presents, men, therapy, writing, my newly acquired internship position and just life in general. After Tanya left, I capped the night off with intensely deep conversation with my new friend, Ben. He is captivating. We talked about sleep, wanderlust, boats, sailing, introspection, artificial intelligence, math, language, poetry and our shared disdain of products made in China. Ben suggested books he thought I might like to read and we exchanged emails. This went on until my husband wandered over to retrieve me and take me home.

After the party I could not sleep because Ben had my head all busy and working and jazzed up about so many things and so many new-to-me ideas. While driving home from the party, I was talking with my husband about my conversation with Ben. My husband's slightly wounded reply was, "You know, I can talk about math with you, too, you know." To which I replied, "I do." But isn't there something invigorating about meeting someone and instantly connecting on so many levels and finding they are interested in who you are and what your thoughts are as well? Clearly, I love my husband and he and I share our lives, good conversation, and a comfy bed, but sometimes, on occasion, for short spurts of time, no matter the amount of effort and love couples put into their relationships, we get mired down in every day life like paying bills, washing dishes, working late and our conversations degrade to short sentences and our affections turn into a peck on the lips before we pass out, exhausted. That is why we need other people in our lives. I believe that our needs as humans include new friends who understand, stimulate, and challenge us in ways we have not been before. How else will we grow and stretch? So, husband, if you visit my blog and happen to read this, while I love you and cherish our time together and the conversations we have about math and other things, I think we both recognize that we need friends to enrich our lives as well so that when we do converse our discussions are broader and spicier and more invigorating. There is room in my life for you and Ben and so many other dear friends, but at the end of the day, you are the one who has my heart.

Thanks for a great time, Tim and Bijaya, and for sharing your friends and family with me!