What I Mean to V

We had our end of session ceremony at Teen Voices tonight. Mentors read paragraphs they had written to their mentees and vice versa.

This is what one of my mentees, V, had to say about me:

From the day my phone rung, I have always liked you. It wasn't when we first met, or when we chuckled during mentoring, it was the minute you said Hi. We were talking for about 20 minutes and I didn't even know you. I was already amazed by the person you were, and the spirit you always carry. I treasured learning about you, and the journey you've experienced; especially what you do in school and your life at home - you truly do inspire me. i don't know who, out of the two-was most excited. The excitement never wore off, and you have been such a help on numerous things. I've not only gained knowledge, but a college friend! I love the fact that you're always smiling, no matter the day. it reminds me to be more like you. You are someone who should be celebrated, not only for your work but for your heart, I hope i have more than today to commemorate. Love always, V-

I just want to be sure to say that I am not posting V---'s paragraph to toot my own horn. I am posting it because I do not know how to express what a joy it has been to mentor at Teen Voices and to be part of the lives of these incredible teen girls. So, maybe by reading their words, you can begin to understand. Maybe it will inspire you to pursue your own volunteer interests or spark a volunteer interest you did not know you had.

What I Mean to A

We had our end of session ceremony at Teen Voices tonight. Mentors read paragraphs they had written to their mentees and vice versa.

This is what one of my mentees, A, had to say about me:

Saturday morning I woke up waiting for your call, not knowing who you were but still anticipating. 9:30, checked my phone, still no call. 10:00, checked it again, still no call. Hours later, checked my phone, OH NO! A missed call from an unknown number. Could it be you? Yes! There's a message: "hi a-, its your mentor Alex, if you coule give me a call back that would be great. Thanx."
Yay! You finally called. I called you back excited to talk to you.
At orientation we learned about first impressions. Guess what? You passed. You made a great first impression. You were funny, and mellow, and just down to earth. When I finally met you that Tuesday in person, you brought us little welcome baggies. Thank you again.
Working with you here has been a very appreciative experience. You may not know it, but I learned a lot from you. You were always somewhat insightful, and fun to talk to. We could talk to you about anything. You always ask us how our days are going and if we were frustrated you allowed us to vent before beginning. you were very understanding. i also found your life very interesting, and I can say that we have something in common that I can relate to.
Soooooooooooooooooooooooo!!! Stay sweet, and I love youuuuu!
Thank you for everything.

I just want to be sure to say that I am not posting A---'s paragraph to toot my own horn. I am posting it because I do not know how to express what a joy it has been to mentor at Teen Voices and to be part of the lives of these incredible teen girls. So, maybe by reading their words, you can begin to understand. Maybe it will inspire you to pursue your own volunteer interests or spark a volunteer interest you did not know you had.

What I Mean to K

We had our end of session ceremony at Teen Voices tonight. Mentors read paragraphs they had written to their mentees and vice versa.

This is what one of my mentees, K, had to say about me:

Alex, OMGEEE Alex, what to say about Alex. I remember when I first talked to you on the phone and you sounded like you were 5. I was like who did Saun pair me up with, and then, when I seen you in person, you looked like you were 18. When V---, A---, and I asked you how old you are and you told us that you were 27, we were all bugged eyed because you look so young. Thankfully you acted it, too. You are a great mentor, from the moments that my group and i were being lazy to the times that we were all amped about working. You even took us to BK, and paid. Whenever one of us needed help, and we know how often that was, you helped us no matter what. I can talk to you about anything, and it was weird because if we came in, as soon as you saw us, you knew our mood. I am thankful to work with you because you were very caring and thoughtful when it came to one of us. Thank you, Alex, for everything that you did for me. Yours truly, K---!!!

I just want to be sure to say that I am not posting K---'s paragraph to toot my own horn. I am posting it because I do not know how to express what a joy it has been to mentor at Teen Voices and to be part of the lives of these incredible teen girls. So, maybe by reading their words, you can begin to understand. Maybe it will inspire you to pursue your own volunteer interests or spark a volunteer interest you did not know you had.

What My Mentees Mean to Me

This afternoon into the evening was my final mentoring session with my three Teen Voices girls. It was cut short because, due to an impending snow storm, the Teen Voices staff decided to move up our appreciation ceremony scheduled for tomorrow evening to this evening. The girls and I got two hours of work done in forty-five minutes time. A.MAZE.ING. So incredibly proud of them!!!!!

So, the ceremony consisted of speeches by the Editor-In-Chief and staff of Teen Voices. The teen girls gave "shout outs" to people they have become close to and spoke about Teen Voices in general. The heart of the ceremony was when the girls read paragraphs they had written to their mentors and the mentors read paragraphs they had written to their girls. I didn't cry, but you better believe there were lots and lots of hugs.

I will post their paragraphs about me individually later.

This is what I had to say to them (names have been protected):

I was blessed with three mentees. When this all started I knew their names, now I like to think I know even just a little piece of their hearts. _______________________________________________________________________
K---. NOT K---. K---. And, if you can’t get it right, K--- will do. Respect, y’all. Original name for an original young lady.

Original because you were the first one I met on our first day.

Original because I don’t know any other ladies who successfully rock the suspenders and pearls and polkadots all at once.

Original because I’ve never heard anyone rap out thoughts and feelings on stage quite the way you did at the Teen Voices spoken word event.

Original because there is not another person who sees the world exactly as you do which is why I hope you continue to share your point of view through writing and photography. Don’t hold back or ever let anyone hold you back from your creative expressions. You have a gift and you would be doing a disservice to the universe if you let anything or anyone get in the way of it. Live your dream.

You always worked hard, but there were times when your silence caused me wonder how interested you really were. As soon as doubt crossed my mind you would do something to show me otherwise. Actions sometimes speak louder than words and I loved that you often reminded me of that. Thank you for always keeping things interesting just by being yourself.
________________________________________________________________________
A---. Not A---. A---. As she says, “Good-ness, get it right people.” Unique name for a unique young woman.

A young women who prefers to work leaning over the table or laying on the ground rather than sitting down.

A young women who loves the word “lothario”.

A young women who thinks and speaks at warp speed and then calls me out when it is obvious by my reply that I only sort of understood half of what she was saying.

A young woman who, during a somewhat confusing conversation about the location of Planned Parenthood, once asked, “Wait? What? They moved the building? Where’d they put it?”

A---, you are amazingly, unfalteringly aware of what you want, where you are going, and how you are going to get there. Hold on to that. Stay confident and determined. The world better watch out, step back, get out the way because you have so much to give, so much to teach, and, when you are done, it will be a better place because you were here. There is nothing you cannot accomplish. You will take, you are in the process of taking, the world by storm. No doubt, you will blow us all away!
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V---. No name confusion here, but a remarkable Miss. nonetheless.

Miss. Conscientious.

Miss. Perfectionist.

Miss. Independent.

Miss. Calls Me Miss.

V---, I admire your willingness to speak honestly about what is on your mind, is going on in your life, without fear of how others might react. It is refreshing and I know that I have benefited from your willingness to share. It is beautiful. You are beautiful. As far as work goes, thank you for keeping everyone on task and staying focused when it would have been just as easy and maybe more fun to fall off the wagon into silly oblivion. Your seriousness and obvious desire to work hard completing the tasks on any given day helped me keep it together. Your honesty and work ethic will get you far. Miss. V---, you are beauty inside and out!
________________________________________________________________________

To all three of you,
I will miss gummy fruit snacks, gathering around one computer to “do it together”, and nagging you about saving your sources. I will miss exchanging big hugs, leaning over your shoulders every five minutes asking how things are going, and telling you how wonderful you are. I am so grateful for your trust, honesty, hard work, and openness to possibilities during our work together. I loved each and every minute. I love each and every one of you. And though I have said it again and again and again I must say it once more. I am so very proud of you and you should be extremely proud of yourselves! Round of applause for K---, A---, and V---!!!!!

Three Teen Girls and a Baby Boy

At the end of October I met Three Teen Girls, my mentees at Teen Voices Magazine. Tuesday and Thursday afternoons we spend two hours together working on their article. Four hours a week doesn't sound like much, but those hours are jam-packed with work, talk, and giggles. Those girls fill-up far more than four hours of my week and no one is more surprised about it than me. I think about the girls every day. I jot things down in my internship journal constantly. I look for tools and resources to help them with their work. I loosely prepare plans for our time together. Time consuming, eh? Why? The only conceivable answer is LOVE. I love the magazine, the work, and, most of all, the girls.

The girls. They have opened my eyes, my heart, and my mind.
My eyes are attuned to details, to each girl's individual world...
My heart is more expansive in responsive to the love the girls so willingly give...
My mind recognizes differences in similarities and similarities in differences...
Eyes, heart, and mind are less stubborn, less resistant, far more flexible...

I am so grateful for the girls' trust, honesty, hard work, and openness to possibilities. It is amazing that we are halfway through our time together. I am loving every minute.

***

One morning a week, I volunteer at Perkin's School for the Blind. I work with an eleven month old Baby Boy. Baby Boy has Nystagmus, possibly 80/20 vision, and low muscle tone. I work with him one-on-one in the early intervention classroom (two trained teachers are present) while his mother goes to an informational workshop with other parents.

Talking with people about Perkins, the common reaction is "How sad." and/or "Seeing what can happen, your desire for children must be much less." For me, there is only joy and my desire for children has remained high and possibly increased. I have always been an optimist, a wisher, a hope'r', and a dreamer.

"How sad." is never something I have felt at Perkins. "How amazing! How inspiring! How adorable! How strong! How beautiful! How smart!" Those are feelings I have had. Every morning I spend there with Baby Boy brings joy. Each successive morning, Baby Boy makes progress. The first morning I spent with him, he napped from 11 to 11:45, but each week he has slept less and less. As time goes on, I notice him sitting up on his own for longer periods of time, reaching for things that I place further away from him, showing me that he is growing physically stronger and that perhaps he can see further than doctors first imagined. He shows me his intellect by repeating actions I have shown him in the past such as banging two items together to make "music". This week, for the first time, when I laid him on the changing table he began furiously kicking his feet, grinning from ear to ear and giggling. Pretty fantastic for a little guy with low muscle tone. Often children with low muscle tone also have trouble with talking and start making sounds much later than normal, but Baby Boy talks more and more each week and especially enjoys talking with me and the giant teddy bear in the classroom. Baby Boy has taught me to live even more in the moment and pay even closer attention to every detail, any shred of progress, than I already do. He has also taught me to be more determined and to push myself well past the imaginary limits I may place on myself. Baby Boy is Joy. Joy leaves no room for sadness.

As far as my still strong, perhaps even stronger, desire to have babies, I don't see how volunteering at Perkins could ever negatively impact that desire. The parents I meet, especially Baby Boy's mother, are inspiring, empowered, and educating themselves in order to be the best parents and advocates for their children. It is a privilege to know them and to observe them. They are incredible and I am in awe. Working with Baby Boy, noting his progress, cuddling his cuddliness, imagining his infinite possibilities, reveling in his accomplishments... How could any of that decrease my desire for babies? Yes, of course these parents and these children have additional challenges, but I watch them continuously meet and overcome them. "but you must have some fear of your children having a disability..." you might venture. I acknowledge that there is always fear when one takes a chance and leaps into the unknown. Bringing a child into the world may be the ultimate gamble any human ever takes. I say, the bigger the gamble, the bigger the reward. I also feel that having this experience at Perkins, getting this hands-on education about differently-abled children, has so far given me greater confidence in my ability and readiness to deal with any challenges my children may have. My strong desire to have children is still intact.

So, fellow bloggers and blog readers, that is where I have been spending my time, with Three Teen Girls and a Baby Boy. Not quite Three Men and a Baby - "They changed her diapers. She changed their lives.", but, minus the cheesy tagline, better I wager.