Finding My Place

Things have changed since I started my Editorial Internship at Teen Voices in January. The other editorial interns I was originally working with are no longer interning. I am now the veteran. I have trained my fellow interns, Jaime and Lizzy. We all work really well collaboratively and play off each others strengths. As they have become more comfortable and come into their own, I no longer feel "the veteran" and I find myself trying to figure out my place.

I guess we are always adjusting. Our roles vary depending on the day, depending on the assignments we are given.

We are all very strong personalities. We laugh a lot and seek advice from each other and get along well. I sometimes feel lost in the mix though. Maybe it is because they are closer in age and having similar experiences where I am nearly six years older than Jaime and even further away in age from Lizzy. Six years may not sound like a lot, but think back to all of that growing and changing you did in your twenties. Six years is an eternity.

Often I wonder if I am doing enough, if I am keeping up. The editor of the magazine tells us all we are "rockstars!" So, she has no complaints which means I have no reason to be wondering or worrying. I just can't help myself.

I move forward doing what I am asked to do and more. I keep up with email, schedule interviews with artists and activists, fact check, keep sending out materials (books and cd's) for our teen reviewers to review, collaborate with my fellow interns on larger projects, process submissions, put together articles, and smile. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy every minute! Making that list, I guess I am doing enough.

Why do I feel a little lost? Maybe it is because my role is undefined. I am used to having a set standard, set responsibilities, set guidelines for achievement. As an intern, that is not the case. Our roles are shifting, moving, changing every day. I would bet that this is the case because the editor wants each of us to have a go at every task, a well-rounded experience. I respect and admire that and am grateful for every experience. It also helps me and Lizzy and Jaime to work well collaboratively because no one is "the star", collectively we are Becca's "rockstars".

Where do I belong? I'm thinking...right where I am.